09 July 2012

Randomly, Spirituality


Not something I've ever discussed here on the blog before, but I'm going through a massive blog-reevaluation and have been for the last year. Part of the reason behind my excessively-sporadic posting is that when I started this blog, it was about writing, and the further into it I got, the more I felt like everything that needed to be said had already been said, by people much better qualified to say it than I.

But. Given the purpose of the blog is, when you get down to it, to help promo the writing, it kind of makes sense that I need to being talking about things other than writing. Then the next struggle: what do readers want to hear?

Cue perfectionism paralysis, something that has killed off the vast majority of all of my other hobbies. My name is Inky, and I sew, quilt, cook, bake, decorate cakes, draw, play piano and write music, I breed Labradors and show them and train them, I, I, I...

The problem is, whenever ANY (read: ALL) of these hobbies get to the point where they might possibly start Being Something, the perfectionism takes over. If I'm going to do something, I have to do it right: this is Rule Number One in the brain of Amy, and it's not an especially helpful rule (I'm working on amending it ;)). So all of a sudden each hobby becomes a business, and business oriented, and before I know it, I'm not doing anything for fun anymore, and I'm killing myself trying to run too many things that might one day be viable businesses if I was only devoting time to one of them, rather than half-arsing them all.

Talk about the ultimate contradiction: my drive to do everything properly is what results in me doing NONE of it properly o.0 La.

ANYWAY. This is all a very long and roundabout way of saying that I am going to trial forgetting all about audience on the blog, and just write whatever I feel like at the time, without regard to the structure or meaningfulness or ability to extract a moral from-ness or ANYTHING LIKE THAT.

Hopefully, it will be fun, and I will actually blog more often. Even more hopefully, some of you will enjoy it and stick around :)

All of which culminates in this: I haven't talked about spirituality here on the blog before, partially from a fear of being controversial, partially from the whole nothing-to-say-that-hasn't-been-said, and partially in a (perhaps misguided??) attempt to keep the blog 'professional'. I still intend to attempt some degree of professionality; however, comments on spirituality, religion, and dare I say it, God, may be forthcoming. (Literally 'may'; I've no concrete plans about anything).

All of which raises the interesting question: Just why the heck DO I feel like I have to apologise for being Christian?? (This is not an antagonistic sentiment; it's something I genuinely feel when conversing with non-Christians, and not because of anything they say or do, but just... because. Hey, if I knew why, I wouldn't be asking the question :P)

2 comments:

Michelle Davidson Argyle said...

Aww, I say blog what you want! In my experience lately, my blog doesn't have much to do with my marketing. At all. It does not sell books. My blog is a place for me to express who I am and what I need to express. This is one of the reasons I took off comments because I wanted it to be a blog instead of a forum-type atmosphere. A lot of bloggers still want comments, and I'm totally fine with that. In fact, I like leaving comments. :) But for my blog, in this time of my life, taking them off has helped me focus on why I really want to blog. It has been a good experience for me.

I am not saying you should turn off comments. Just saying that you have to do what works for you, and i hope you find a place where you can feel like this space is somewhere you are comfortable. :)

*hugs*

Amy said...

Thanks, Glam. I appreciate your input, especially having watched your blog develop over the years :) (Gosh, has it really been that many years already?!)

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